Spotler’s Christmas Crackers

Cracker jokes: some make you cringe but are guaranteed to bring a smile to your face. We all need a laugh this year so pull a cracker with Spotler this Christmas!

What does Santa suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney? Claus-trophobia!
What do Santa’s little helpers learn at school? The elf-abet! 
Why was the turkey in the pop group? Because he was the only one with drumsticks!
What did Adam say the day before Christmas? “It’s Christmas, Eve!” 
What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire? Frostbite!

What did the stamp say to the Christmas card? Stick with me and we’ll go places!

Why don’t you ever see Santa in hospital? Because he has private elf care!
Who hides in the bakery at Christmas? A mince 
How do snowmen get around? They ride an icicle!
What carol is heard in the desert? ‘O camel ye faithful!’ 

What do reindeer hang on their Christmas trees? Horn-aments!
How will Christmas dinner be different after Brexit? No Brussels!
Why couldn’t the skeleton go to the Christmas Party? Because he had no body to go with!
What do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells!
Who’s Rudolph’s favourite pop star? Beyon-sleigh!

Which football team did the baby Jesus support? Manger-ster United!
Which TV Christmas special is being filmed in Brussels this year? Deal Or No Deal!
How can you tell that Santa is real? You can always sense his presents!
Why didn’t the rope get any Christmas presents? It was knotty!
What athlete is warmest in winter? A long jumper!

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